All relationships need to be nurtured. It takes effort, attention, and communication to build a warm and fulfilling connection with any person. With effort, love grows; with neglect, it withers and dies.
As a money coach and financial planner working with people to get their financial houses in order, I find that our relationship with money is similar. When we ignore, neglect, or misunderstand our money, it can cause major problems in our lives. The kind of things that fester underground for a while until they one day blow up in our faces.
That’s never pretty.
You don’t have to buy flowers for your checkbook or send love notes to your bank account, but here are ten simple steps you can take to fall in love with money and keep it flowing towards you.
10 Ways to Fall in Love with Money
1. Be there.
Nobody wants to be pushed away or examined with suspicion. Your money is no different. It wants to honor you and serve you, to enhance your life and support your values. So honor and respect your money. Open up, invite it in, pay attention to your money and let abundance flow.
2. Learn to communicate.
We all know that a relationship will only flourish with open, honest communication. Learn to talk to and listen to your money. What’s it telling you? The numbers on that bank statement are screaming for attention. Hear what they’re saying and answer them with love. Is it time to pay down your debts, invest for your retirement, or wipe away your money fog? Without positive communication, your money relationship will stay tied in knots and be fraught with tears. It won’t survive. The more you communicate the closer and more supportive you will be with each other.
3. Be willing to work through the tough stuff.
Throwing in the towel on your relationship with money is not the path to bliss. All relationships have ups and downs. Face the discomfort with love and know that happier times are just around the corner.
4. Laugh about it.
A large dose of humor and a light-hearted attitude can work wonders for your money relationship. Ever noticed how much fun it is to hang out with happy, cheerful people? Don’t get heavy with your money. It’s there to serve you, not drag you down.
5. Validation and compliments.
We all love a good word. A passerby complimenting your gorgeous sweater lifts your spirits for the whole day. Your money is no exception. Tell your money how wonderfully it serves you and how good it makes you feel. Show your cash how deeply you care. Say thank you for supporting me.
6. Rekindle the Romance.
Do you associate money tasks with drudgery and stress? Intimacy and romance are the cornerstones of a loving relationship. So light a candle, play some soft background music and take a look at your numbers. Add a glass of wine. It might be more romantic than you think.
7. Admit mistakes.
We all mess up. None of us go through life without bumps and bruises and maybe a broken bone. Recognize your money mistakes for what they are – stepping stones to a more aware and knowledgeable you. Learn from your foibles and then let go. Move on and create more joy.
8. Compassion, acceptance, and forgiveness.
Part two of handling your mistakes. Be gentle on yourself and learn to forgive. Most of us didn’t learn this money stuff growing up. If you’re suffering from losses, challenges, or all around money shame a little compassion goes a long way in getting you through the tough times.
9. Terms of endearment.
We have nicknames for our kids and pet names for our honeys. Adopting affectionate names for our money matters creates positivity, no matter what you’re dealing with. Rename your bank statements as “love letters from the bank”. Re-label your mortgage document as “love shack paperwork.” Call your insurance policies “blessings for my family in case of emergency.” Terms of endearment help you turn down the stress and turn on the love.
10. Make your relationship with money a priority.
Our lives are full and frantic. We juggle work, homework with our kids, soccer practice, piano lessons, laundry, grocery shopping and date nights with our honey. Money gets shoved to the bottom of the to-do list. We only pay attention to it when it’s causing us problems or we need to ask it a favor. Schedule in a regular, weekly money date and get to know your money matters in a new, beautiful and intimate light.
Are you living with money anxiety? Trying to maneuver your way through the financial fog? Aren’t you so ready for a more loving relationship with your money?
Adopting these steps and giving your money relationship what it needs to thrive is a truly loving gesture.
If you could use some hand-holding or if you’re ready to fall in love faster and smarter let’s set up a Free Discovery Call. Click here to contact me.